On being an ally
With increasing unrest in the country due to the ongoing racism and oppression of people of color, there is a glimmer of hope that things may finally begin to change. More and more people are understanding that we cannot stay silent because we don’t know what to say. We cannot excuse this behavior. We cannot stand with white people when they are wrong and it is leading to excruciating pain and trauma all over the country. At the same time, you may feel hopeless or unsure how to make a difference.
So, how can we help? There are several things we can do. We need to educate ourselves, understand our own privilege, understand how race affects every aspect of the lives of people of color, and own our part in ongoing systemic racism. We must stand up to others when they feel safe to share their racist viewpoints with us “because we are white”. We need to be allies to people of color. We cannot ignore it because it is hard or uncomfortable. We can support the black community, sign petitions, contact lawmakers, and donate to causes. I certainly don’t have all the answers. I don’t know what it is like to live as a person of color or to be discriminated against on a daily basis. I do know that I can do better and that it is going to take all of us doing our own work to begin to change things.
Educate yourself and your family. We must educate ourselves on implicit bias, overt and covert racism, and micro and macro aggressions. You can find plenty of resources right now.
Do your own research. Avoid asking your friends or colleagues of color what you need to know. It is not their job to educate us. You can find so much online.
Own your privilege and implicit bias. Understand that we live in a society where white people benefit from the oppression of others. Own it. Understand it. Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack is a good place to start.
Do your best and apologize when you mess up. We are not going to be perfect. We don’t know everything. We have been brought up in this society and taught things that are not right. We have to unlearn these thoughts and behaviors. We have to do better. When we do mess up, we have to own it. It can be uncomfortable and it has to be done.
Be an ally for those communities of color rather than for racists. Staying silent may seem more comfortable than speaking out against those you know. We need to hold them accountable. We need to make it uncomfortable and uncommon to share racist thoughts and ideas.